But she is right there are times when being a car guy gets old so with the inspiration of a facebook post and my wifes comment this is my list of grievances with being a car nut.
#5:
A car that looks or sounds fast will attract drooling idiots faster than a wet tee shirt contest with free beer.
Nothing ruins date night faster than a pile of junk that sounds like a bunch of angry bees in a coffee can rolling up on me like a big dog in heat.
Never mind the laws of physics nothing is going to stop this dork from proving his manhood to me.
Now
I admit there may have been a time, ah, or 2, that I
pummeled an ego into dust in this situation. But most of the time I just roll my eyes and
hope the juvenile delinquent with a superiority complex dosn’t get anyone killed. They rarely have the brains to handle power or the decency to care who they
put in danger trying to prove themselves.
#4:
I don't mean to be rude but I'm here for gas and don't really care about the car you wish you had never sold.
Along the same lines as #5 stopping for gas with a respectable street machine takes on a whole new meaning. If you live on the right
side of the Mason Dixon line you can count on some good ol' boy coming up to
you and asking “Will it run?” As a yankee it took me about 2 months to
understand they are asking if the car is fast. Once I learned that my usual response was no you idiot it looks and sounds fast but will barely keep up with traffic on the freeway.
Now
to be fair most of the time I do like visiting with guys about cars and the Miata in farm country is much better than the red and white stripped Mustang was in Texas. But all the stories of the old gem that would go from 0-60 in 2 seconds and get 49 miles to the gallon that they are working on or wish they had never sold do get old.
#3: If
you want to tell someone about their mistakes start with your parents.
Do
people who paint graffiti on box cars have other people who paint graffiti on
box cars come up to them and say my 5 year old can paint better than that? Do
people who go to chili cook offs tell the cooks the
chili they spent months perfecting is terrible?
Camaro guys freak over parting out a Camaro SS to build an ugly girls car, the Miata guys think I ruined what makes
a Miata a Miata, and both camps are horrified at the disorganized
mess of wire, hoses and clutter under the hood. But all pale in comparison to
the jerk that said "No offense but my 5 year old can weld better than that."
#2: Unless your wife is a bigger fool than you are your car obsession is not at the top of the honey do list.
There's only so many ways you can explain that in order to
make the most of the new camshaft you need new gears and the new furniture
will have to wait.
But
even if you're not spending money you are spending time and the
hours in the garage and at events can push any relationship to crabbyville.
I
have a couple of friends that work around this by spending 1 to 1 on furniture and other pointless household items to keep peace in the
family. I’m fine with that approach as long and my wife never finds out. My
current strategy is to just keep promising the car will be done soon and so far
she is OK with that bold faced lie. And of course she knows this is just a faze I am
going through that will soon pass...;-)
#1:
There are two words that go with a car that has a lot of time, effort and emotion invested in it
Money Pit.
Building your ideal car can get insanely expensive, not to mention track time, race gas,
safety gear and maintenance.
And that's not counting the ticket you just got for no front license plate or the new oil pan you need because you thought you would clear that speed bump.
OK so what is the solution to all these problems with being a car nut? Well I'd be happy to address that but I just registered for a top speed run at an airport a couple states away with a car that is not drivable and have to go call Flyin Miata now!
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